The Law of the Playground
the pupil report of
Karma Assassin
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I was twelve, she was in her thirties, she taught R.E. and we were in a storeroom alone together collecting textbooks. And it wasn't me that said it. So much for Catholic morality.
approved Apr 21 2003, submitted Mar 31 2003 by Karma Assassin
Bug, 'cause it was his actual nickname.
Jug-Lug, 'cause his ears stuck out like jug handles.
Tug-A-Lug, 'cause after sneaking off from registration into the toilets after lunch, a swift guerilla raid caught him mid-wank.
All combined into the ultimate all-purpose nickname - Tug-A-Lug-Jug-Lug-Bug. A masterpiece of insult engineering that resonates to this day.
We let him finish his wank though. We weren't THAT cruel.
approved Mar 3 2003, submitted Mar 3 2003 by Karma Assassin
Mr. Badman, our games teacher, not only had a glass eye, but was devoted to the talent of Billy Joel. One afternoon's games session was called off due to a mix of rain and apathy on our parts, and we were forced to pack into the Biology Lab and watch Billy Joel's greatest hits on video for over an hour. Despite offerering to run laps in the rain in our pants, we were forced to sit and watch this sickening filth until our brains poured out our noses.
approved Dec 16 2002, submitted Dec 15 2002 by Karma Assassin